Conversation with a lost love
10/9/14
Her: I will always love you. You know that?
It's kinda scary how much alike we are
Him: Well, hun wish you were here - tell about some new music- everytime u introduce me to a new song I fall in love with it. I love you too.
Her: You know I hate being called Hun.
Him: Well Fuck.
Her: HAHAHA What's on your mind? Ever heard the song Monster by Megan Myers?
Him: Goddamn, I have missed you. I'll never be what u want, what u need, or even what u deserve - but I'll be damned if I say I didn't miss you.
Her: I miss you too. Talk to me. What's on your mind?!
Him: Just you- NOW- damn u- just you
Such a beautifully wicked woman
Her: I'm... sorry?
No, I'm gonna take that as a compliment.
Him: It was definitely, infinitely a compliment- who needs boring sedate people who play by the rules? Not I
Her: I did a professional shoot earlier this year- wanna see some of my pictures?
Him: Of course I do, but your pictures will never be as beautiful as the image of you in my mind the first time we made love.
Her: I thought guys didn't 'make love'
Him: That just shows your usual poor choice in men. A real man makes love. Any moron can fuck a girl.
Her: Well... I don't recall you ever calling it that...
Him: I don't know how I could call the first time with you anything BUT the epitome of lovemaking
I don't have a boat. I don't have a big fat bank account. I don't have the attention span of a gnat.
All that I have is my Heart and my word-and I don't let just anyone break them.
Her: I have no plans of breaking anything of yours.
Him: I believe that you have no plans.
Her: What does that mean?? I have nothing to offer anyone- Absolutely nothing- I am just a bitter bitchy soulless wench.
Him: I'm sure that your motives don't include hurting me. It's just an unfortunate side effect of the tsunami that Is K______
Lucky for you that I welcome it al.
Her:
Him:
Thursday, October 9, 2014
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
Time has come
Time has come
I.
So many loves lost
And still just one life to lose
Shadows reverberate in my memories of this lost moment-
(or that one… I forget)
While the present stands still as a corpse
As still as I try to hold this life
not-quite-lost
Yet never, apparently, to be … found.
II.
I try each day to give up on this addiction to – life
Attempting to block out meanings so endlessly futile
And reasons that just bring deeper guilt
III.
I hold my heart, I smother it, one beat at a time
I whisper to it softly, “Hush.. close your eyes. It will all be over soon”
Forgive, Forswear, but above all- Forget.
These open eyes have done nothing but curse me, all these years
“There will come a time, you’ll see, when no more tears- and love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears. Get over your hill- and see- what you find there, with grace in your heart and fly- was in your head..” Mumford and sons, After the storm
IV.
There will come a time, you’ll see-
When the only thing you fear- is keeping on.
V.
Endlessly twisting, this fate of mine
Always held it in my hands- Am I lucky that way?
or is that me taking destiny by a strong hand and shaking my own fears into submission?
I have always known that I own this life
Double edged sword, that.
Believing it, makes me understand that THIS is the future I bequeathed myself.
No one to blame but me
Own the Hell that you have given yourself.
If you can.
VI.
Myself? I’m working on it.
Fade, 7/1/2014 .. fuck, did I make it this long? Still don’t know if that’s a shame or a blessing...
Wednesday, May 14, 2014
Letter
to Myself: Notations on semi-insanity
Q: If
you stop to wonder if you are insane, does that imply that you are not too far
gone?
Q2: Or
does it indicate that you are so far over the edge of madness that you have to
ask?
A:
Who's really sane, anyhow?
And for
that matter who is the epitome of saneness that he (or she, heaven forbid) can
be self righteous enough to deem others lacking in that intangible quality? I,
as a doubter of the sanity of the Universe/Multiverse in general say that I am
a prime candidate for that position... but then again, I never was much into
the politics of status. O' lovely nonsense thy name is Man.
Why
delude yourself with the truth when you can simply deny reality,
ignore
injustice and pain, and pretend that you're having a good time?
Don't
try to define the reasons for existence- Do as most men (and
women)
- Be as hollow as everyone else. Beleaguering yourself with existential
ponderances will only make you see the world as it really is –
...And
that will only make you want to leave..!
If life
were as simple as some perceive it to be, then the ignorant
would
reign and those who lived by thought would be seen as the ultimate fools
Hmm...
maybe it is that simple after all.
kirk - 04/19/92
22 years ago, Same thoughts,same conclusions
Is
it only death and dark-done deeds that rule this - this - existence?
I can only 'hope' that in the end I will understand
No
love to call your OWN, No life to really feel...Every being to use all those
around them, solely to enhance the so called quality of that
"existence".
It
was always too easy to denounce those statements as callous and untrue. But,
but but-
Those
who feel AND think rather than those who either feel or think know the
terrible, sickening truth. When I was but a boy, maybe ten years old, I used to
wish that I was a dog, or a cat, or any animal but the one I am. Something that
just lived its life to survive with nary a thought to why or how. And here I
am, again. What is wisdom, that I still completely want that oblivious
existence? What is knowledge, that
I
find that I knew it all, when I was but ten years old?
Enough
could be enough, except for the optimistic dream that there still can be found
a meaning, a reason, a PURPOSE. Doubter that I am, I feel that there never will
be found one, that there is none. I always went through these motions, of
doubt, of self-pity, of hate, of sorrow, of death of soul and heart; but always
there went an angel of creation, who followed my thoughts and gave me happiness
in that I was only
one step away from the god/dream/fantasy that is
Truth. I always gave the appearance of
despondency, of the despair of utter failure- and now, as i sit here, I Feel
it, for maybe the first complete time, I understand the futility of the search
for truth and know that to take my own life would be the only dignity I could
afford myself, even though no one would ever understand, ending it all for this
"life" simply because I do not allow myself the clouding of my soul,
do not allow myself to wallow in the hypocrisy in order to survive.
And
still, I will not die.
Therefore,
I am THE Hypocrite of hypocrites, the damned of the damned...
God, if you truly exist,
then truly you are a spiteful old goat of a deity, for your evil
"Hope" will not let me quit, will not let me quit... And, I
persevere, for nothing? for everything-
I can only 'hope' that in the end I will understand
1992
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Rolling stones-Letter to Amy
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJV2pWFyfn4
Everyone, at least that I know, always considered me the bad boy- the rolling stone.
I get that (I earned it) but when I t comes to you and Rain, I stopped rolling. I didn't really have a choice. I suppose that I did- but that one choice in my life saved everything about me. This song- is how I have always fantasized my life to be. Its how my dad lived. Its how I was brought up, really. But, its a complicated thing... like most things are.
This song, in ways, sums up a lot of the animosity between me and your mother.
I was that rolling stone- then I wasn't. This song was about me, until I changed it. In your world- this song isn't about me at all. But sometimes I wish it was. That's where your mom comes in.
She's the rolling stone. And- as much as I hate her for it- I love her for it too. Some days I just burn with jealousy that she gets to do whatever she wants, when she wants. Free as she lets herself be. No obligations, No commitments.
Her days are her own.
That's an intoxicating thing, in and of itself. There's less stress when you only have yourself to fend for, there's no decisions that don't benefit you and you alone.
I think of your mother, and I think of this big door with a glowing EXIT sign above it- where I can run through- and escape into myself and myself alone.
I do understand her. I understand her too much.
it's a life without responsibility- without accountability- without thoughts for the future. And without those factors- it makes life an emptiness.
Self is nothing, in the end. Its a lonely, empty room in a castle you may be King of- but its worth absolutely nothing if you haven't lived for someone else at least a few times in your life.
Everyone, at least that I know, always considered me the bad boy- the rolling stone.
I get that (I earned it) but when I t comes to you and Rain, I stopped rolling. I didn't really have a choice. I suppose that I did- but that one choice in my life saved everything about me. This song- is how I have always fantasized my life to be. Its how my dad lived. Its how I was brought up, really. But, its a complicated thing... like most things are.
This song, in ways, sums up a lot of the animosity between me and your mother.
I was that rolling stone- then I wasn't. This song was about me, until I changed it. In your world- this song isn't about me at all. But sometimes I wish it was. That's where your mom comes in.
She's the rolling stone. And- as much as I hate her for it- I love her for it too. Some days I just burn with jealousy that she gets to do whatever she wants, when she wants. Free as she lets herself be. No obligations, No commitments.
Her days are her own.
That's an intoxicating thing, in and of itself. There's less stress when you only have yourself to fend for, there's no decisions that don't benefit you and you alone.
I think of your mother, and I think of this big door with a glowing EXIT sign above it- where I can run through- and escape into myself and myself alone.
I do understand her. I understand her too much.
it's a life without responsibility- without accountability- without thoughts for the future. And without those factors- it makes life an emptiness.
Self is nothing, in the end. Its a lonely, empty room in a castle you may be King of- but its worth absolutely nothing if you haven't lived for someone else at least a few times in your life.
Live for others, so that they may live. That is my lesson for the day.
Thursday, May 1, 2014
Sunday, April 27, 2014
Women love me for who i "Am" if they could only change me
What ifs are knives in your back. The truth is, Yes, you could have settled for this person, or that person in the past- and it might have worked out. But there's Always a reason that you didn't Settle. And thank god that you didn't- because you would have only brought pain to that person, if your heart wasn't in it.
Some of us just weren't made for those octogenarian photo shoots into our own limelight. Some of us can't settle. We can't even settle on ourselves- HOW could we ever be expected to settle on someone else for that level of permanence. We can't. We can try. But its a doomed endeavor, I'm afraid.
Some of us aren't meant for the normal route. Just not in our blood- Deep inside- its not arrogance- its not ego-= its that we Understand - MORE than anyone else- that we would fail at this relationship horseshit- just not our thing to compromise on that level. Maybe we are too invested in ourselves, but really I think, after so many failed relationships- that its a mercy that I don't let another woman talk me into another relationship.
Women always tell me they love me for who I am, but that I can change.... I admire the blind optimism of their ambition. if not their hypocrisy
Some of us just weren't made for those octogenarian photo shoots into our own limelight. Some of us can't settle. We can't even settle on ourselves- HOW could we ever be expected to settle on someone else for that level of permanence. We can't. We can try. But its a doomed endeavor, I'm afraid.
Some of us aren't meant for the normal route. Just not in our blood- Deep inside- its not arrogance- its not ego-= its that we Understand - MORE than anyone else- that we would fail at this relationship horseshit- just not our thing to compromise on that level. Maybe we are too invested in ourselves, but really I think, after so many failed relationships- that its a mercy that I don't let another woman talk me into another relationship.
Women always tell me they love me for who I am, but that I can change.... I admire the blind optimism of their ambition. if not their hypocrisy
Monday, January 20, 2014
The Dreamer Journal
The Dreamer journal had a Boris Vallejo painting on the cover- Dragon Slayer.
I wrote this explanation on page 1 of the journal:
The Cover; why?:
Myself, against the powers of the unknown, striving to defeat that which is, binding the logic that holds man back and using it to unveil new (and old) mysteries.
On the inside cover I wrote this dedication from a collection of the Marquis de Sade's writing I had:
"My manner of thinking, so you say, cannot be approved. Do you suppose I care? A poor fool indeed is he who adopts a manner of thinking for others! My manner of thinking stems straight from my considered reflections; it holds with my existence, with the way I am made. It is not in my power to alter it; and were it, I'd not do so. This manner of thinking you find fault with is my sole consolation in Life; It alleviates all my sufferings in prison, it composes all my pleasures in the world outside, it is dearer to me than life itself. Not my manner of thinking, but the manner of thinking of others has caused my unhappiness. The reasoning man who scorns the prejudices of simpletons necessarily becomes the enemy of simpletons; he must expect as much, and laugh at the inevitable.
The Marquis De Sade
On the Dedication/Title page I wrote the following:
For Enlightenment, Entertainment
In the interest of furthering my own knowledge of myself, life and my thoughts of the cohesive spirits which hold all together- Fade 10/13/93
I wrote this explanation on page 1 of the journal:
The Cover; why?:
Myself, against the powers of the unknown, striving to defeat that which is, binding the logic that holds man back and using it to unveil new (and old) mysteries.
On the inside cover I wrote this dedication from a collection of the Marquis de Sade's writing I had:
"My manner of thinking, so you say, cannot be approved. Do you suppose I care? A poor fool indeed is he who adopts a manner of thinking for others! My manner of thinking stems straight from my considered reflections; it holds with my existence, with the way I am made. It is not in my power to alter it; and were it, I'd not do so. This manner of thinking you find fault with is my sole consolation in Life; It alleviates all my sufferings in prison, it composes all my pleasures in the world outside, it is dearer to me than life itself. Not my manner of thinking, but the manner of thinking of others has caused my unhappiness. The reasoning man who scorns the prejudices of simpletons necessarily becomes the enemy of simpletons; he must expect as much, and laugh at the inevitable.
The Marquis De Sade
On the Dedication/Title page I wrote the following:
For Enlightenment, Entertainment
In the interest of furthering my own knowledge of myself, life and my thoughts of the cohesive spirits which hold all together- Fade 10/13/93
Entry 2, Book of Love journal
August 20, 1994
We love each other. All those years that I practiced arrogance and mistrust, all the times I hurt others in order to not be hurt, All my life-pretending not to know love, afraid of it, unsure of all that it held for my future. All my Life, Love is all that I ever wanted...
- And so suddenly those dreams were answered -
... So, why am I alone, here writing in a dark room, regretting my failures- to trust, to commit and to love her as unconditionally as she does me?
Fool. Vain, Selfish, and simply stupid. What a total fool I have been... I've been twisted into worshipping sex and style and materials rather than trust and happiness- and LOVE
I can't believe that I'm still learning new things about relationships and love, when I thought that I knew it all, long ago...
Learning even now, I can't believe that I've been shutting everything down, just existing, I haven't even been in full control. Everything's been on autopilot.
Well, I'm back, Let's see if I can pull us out...
Let's see if we can pull us out.
We love each other. All those years that I practiced arrogance and mistrust, all the times I hurt others in order to not be hurt, All my life-pretending not to know love, afraid of it, unsure of all that it held for my future. All my Life, Love is all that I ever wanted...
- And so suddenly those dreams were answered -
... So, why am I alone, here writing in a dark room, regretting my failures- to trust, to commit and to love her as unconditionally as she does me?
Fool. Vain, Selfish, and simply stupid. What a total fool I have been... I've been twisted into worshipping sex and style and materials rather than trust and happiness- and LOVE
I can't believe that I'm still learning new things about relationships and love, when I thought that I knew it all, long ago...
Learning even now, I can't believe that I've been shutting everything down, just existing, I haven't even been in full control. Everything's been on autopilot.
Well, I'm back, Let's see if I can pull us out...
Let's see if we can pull us out.
April 1999 - Skeleton Journal
1st entry, Skeleton Journal 4/18/99
Well, since my other books are poems, thoughts, dreams,etc. I will just make this one a simple journal. Document my daily tribulations and whatnot. Here goes...
It's a Sunday night, about 10:45. Andrea and I are the only ones here, Steve Wariner is playing on the stereo, the haunting yet optimistic song "Holes in the floor of Heaven.". A whole lot happened this weekend. Too damn much, in fact. Started off Friday with Clayton and Bubba going to jail. No big deal there. A little respite for me, actually- and hopefully some meaningful reflection for the two of them. It's hard to write about this because I have talked to about ten people this weekend about those two, and it's getting to be a stale conversation. Suffice it to say: They have screwed up for the last time- (well at least around me). Clayton is supposed to get out around midnight tonight. I had decided to tell him to go someplace else. but I don't really know exactly what I will do until I do it. I can't take care of my friends indefinitely. Even though they don't seem to have a problem with it (Yah right).
Andrea is right at seven and a half months pregnant now. She is expecting a girl. Amethyst Sky Berryhill- Amy for short. If it was a boy, the name was to be Tristan Cain. But it looks like a girl. My first daughter- and Andrea's first child. We have just about everything we need, changing table, carseats, stroller, etc,etc, etc. It hasn't been a bad pregnancy. Andrea hasn't been a bit of trouble, like all my married friends have said. Of course, Andrea isn't a bitch, like your normal woman. She really is a gem. I thank god or whoever is responsible for bringing her to me every time that I curl up next to her at night. She has been dealing with this latest crisis quite well. I think that she has wanted me to put my foot down long ago, but bless her heart, she trusts me to do the right thing without any undue (or due) nagging.
Anyway, I don't want to go on and on about my troubles. I worked on the yard all day, after taking Andrea out to Zoo-kini's restaurant for lunch. We relaxed at home, made love and started to watch a movie, What Dreams May Come. Ric and Cyndi showed up and watched with us. The movie was great, really a thought provoking one. It was the kind of movie that makes you set back and take stock of what you have in life. I am happy to have two wonderful sons and a wife that I thought couldn't possibly exist. And I appreciate their love, and their very existence very much. They ARE my life. Well. its getting late, and I'm getting tired. I guess this is a weird way to start a journal, but there it is... Bye.
Entry 2 Skeleton Journal 4/19/99
Quick Entry: I'm surfing the internet, drinking Mickies left over from the weekend. Andrea's taking a bath. I just won an argument about Ally Mcbeal - about the John "Guy's" age. Yes! I rule! Anyway- I just remembered my new journal thingie and decided to enter something over not writing in the damn thing at all- (Dedication Baby! Aren't you jealous?) Alright gotta go! - Kirk
Well, since my other books are poems, thoughts, dreams,etc. I will just make this one a simple journal. Document my daily tribulations and whatnot. Here goes...
It's a Sunday night, about 10:45. Andrea and I are the only ones here, Steve Wariner is playing on the stereo, the haunting yet optimistic song "Holes in the floor of Heaven.". A whole lot happened this weekend. Too damn much, in fact. Started off Friday with Clayton and Bubba going to jail. No big deal there. A little respite for me, actually- and hopefully some meaningful reflection for the two of them. It's hard to write about this because I have talked to about ten people this weekend about those two, and it's getting to be a stale conversation. Suffice it to say: They have screwed up for the last time- (well at least around me). Clayton is supposed to get out around midnight tonight. I had decided to tell him to go someplace else. but I don't really know exactly what I will do until I do it. I can't take care of my friends indefinitely. Even though they don't seem to have a problem with it (Yah right).
Andrea is right at seven and a half months pregnant now. She is expecting a girl. Amethyst Sky Berryhill- Amy for short. If it was a boy, the name was to be Tristan Cain. But it looks like a girl. My first daughter- and Andrea's first child. We have just about everything we need, changing table, carseats, stroller, etc,etc, etc. It hasn't been a bad pregnancy. Andrea hasn't been a bit of trouble, like all my married friends have said. Of course, Andrea isn't a bitch, like your normal woman. She really is a gem. I thank god or whoever is responsible for bringing her to me every time that I curl up next to her at night. She has been dealing with this latest crisis quite well. I think that she has wanted me to put my foot down long ago, but bless her heart, she trusts me to do the right thing without any undue (or due) nagging.
Anyway, I don't want to go on and on about my troubles. I worked on the yard all day, after taking Andrea out to Zoo-kini's restaurant for lunch. We relaxed at home, made love and started to watch a movie, What Dreams May Come. Ric and Cyndi showed up and watched with us. The movie was great, really a thought provoking one. It was the kind of movie that makes you set back and take stock of what you have in life. I am happy to have two wonderful sons and a wife that I thought couldn't possibly exist. And I appreciate their love, and their very existence very much. They ARE my life. Well. its getting late, and I'm getting tired. I guess this is a weird way to start a journal, but there it is... Bye.
Entry 2 Skeleton Journal 4/19/99
Quick Entry: I'm surfing the internet, drinking Mickies left over from the weekend. Andrea's taking a bath. I just won an argument about Ally Mcbeal - about the John "Guy's" age. Yes! I rule! Anyway- I just remembered my new journal thingie and decided to enter something over not writing in the damn thing at all- (Dedication Baby! Aren't you jealous?) Alright gotta go! - Kirk
Sunday, January 19, 2014
And they read...
I've decided to transcribe my personal journals into the Tubez... There are three main ones, the Dreamer journal, the 'book of love', and the skeleton journal. I've no plan how to do this, i'll just transcribe entries as I see fit.
This is the first thing that I wrote into the "Book of Love" undated-
...And they read, and they laughed- They scorned his writings as non-intellectual, hypocritical, and nonsensical-
But they didn't understand.
He laughed at himself, with himself and for himself. He knew that nothing mattered, as he knew his writings didn't... Even though they meant everything to him, He knew to everyone else it would all be gobbledy-gook, unintelligible gibberish.
He Cared Not. The writing was his salvation- the EXPLANATION, the all-important explanation for life, for living,... Without that expression, he was nothing. - Oblivion in a shell.
- In His world- He was God. He was all. Not arrogantly, not selfishly- but in order to save his heart, and his being- he had to become his own god-
And so, he did...
He did.
He was.
He IS.
And ever will be, in spirit,
His own god...
This is the first thing that I wrote into the "Book of Love" undated-
...And they read, and they laughed- They scorned his writings as non-intellectual, hypocritical, and nonsensical-
But they didn't understand.
He laughed at himself, with himself and for himself. He knew that nothing mattered, as he knew his writings didn't... Even though they meant everything to him, He knew to everyone else it would all be gobbledy-gook, unintelligible gibberish.
He Cared Not. The writing was his salvation- the EXPLANATION, the all-important explanation for life, for living,... Without that expression, he was nothing. - Oblivion in a shell.
- In His world- He was God. He was all. Not arrogantly, not selfishly- but in order to save his heart, and his being- he had to become his own god-
And so, he did...
He did.
He was.
He IS.
And ever will be, in spirit,
His own god...
Chasin mah tail
Forever chasing the women who don't need me.
Don't get me wrong. I appreciate her honesty. She doesn't pretend. She don't blow smoke, much as I'd like her to. She's not troubled by these damnable illusions- That I love so fucking much... Or- If she is- it's not something that she shares with her lover. Because, that's what I am. I suspect (Strongly) that this is what I'm damned/destined to be- in her world.
LOL- "She's just not that into YOU"
At least we have the SEX- And, mind you, it IS ALL CAPS SEX. Its not just good, its MF-ing Awesome. So, for once, I'm trying to trade UP on that.
Trying to get a woman to Love me- for the Sex...
The irony is NOT lost on me. Ha! She's in bed- and I'm up Writing/drinking. I KNOW the answer. I just don't want to accept it.
1/18/14
FADE
Don't get me wrong. I appreciate her honesty. She doesn't pretend. She don't blow smoke, much as I'd like her to. She's not troubled by these damnable illusions- That I love so fucking much... Or- If she is- it's not something that she shares with her lover. Because, that's what I am. I suspect (Strongly) that this is what I'm damned/destined to be- in her world.
LOL- "She's just not that into YOU"
At least we have the SEX- And, mind you, it IS ALL CAPS SEX. Its not just good, its MF-ing Awesome. So, for once, I'm trying to trade UP on that.
Trying to get a woman to Love me- for the Sex...
The irony is NOT lost on me. Ha! She's in bed- and I'm up Writing/drinking. I KNOW the answer. I just don't want to accept it.
1/18/14
FADE
Retrospect - haiku
Dark Passions Dying
Thoughts of a Time I still cared
Slow death of a Fool
Retrospect
Carnations and Cash
She told me that she liked the flowers, but that she'd prefer Gifts that she can hold on to.
...
Deja Vu - I've heard this conversation before. It broke my heart the first time- And it breaks my heart again...
The Gift in "Flowers" is not only a gift, its a lesson- and, damn, its almost starting to feel like a test. Apparently one that the women that I chase after fail.
If she's doing the mental math to consider what I could have bought for her = instead of those damn, dying flowers- well... I don't want to dwell on that, too much.
It's at that point that she 'lost' me- or at least lost a part of my respect. You either get it, or you don't.
I'm not going to explain it.
I'll take a woman who prefers flowers to Diamond- ANY DAY.
- if I can find one...
(wink)
1/18/14
...
Deja Vu - I've heard this conversation before. It broke my heart the first time- And it breaks my heart again...
The Gift in "Flowers" is not only a gift, its a lesson- and, damn, its almost starting to feel like a test. Apparently one that the women that I chase after fail.
If she's doing the mental math to consider what I could have bought for her = instead of those damn, dying flowers- well... I don't want to dwell on that, too much.
It's at that point that she 'lost' me- or at least lost a part of my respect. You either get it, or you don't.
I'm not going to explain it.
I'll take a woman who prefers flowers to Diamond- ANY DAY.
- if I can find one...
(wink)
1/18/14
The Weakling by REH
I thought that I had everything that REH had ever published, but ran across this gem posted on Weird Tales magazine's FB page... Perfect!
"The Weakling" by Robert E. Howard
I died in sin and forthwith went to Hell;
I made myself at home upon the coals...
Where seas of flame break on the cinder shoals.
Till Satan came and said with angry yell,
"You there - divulge what route by which you fell."
"I spent my youth among the flowing bowls,
"Wasted my life with women of dark souls,
"Died brothel-fighting - drunk on muscatel."
Said he, "My friend, you've been directed wrong:
"You've naught to recommend you for our feasts -
"Like factory owners, brokers, elders, priests;
"The air for you! This place is for the strong!
"Then as I pondered, minded to rebel,
He laughed and forthwith kicked me out of Hell.
I died in sin and forthwith went to Hell;
I made myself at home upon the coals...
Where seas of flame break on the cinder shoals.
Till Satan came and said with angry yell,
"You there - divulge what route by which you fell."
"I spent my youth among the flowing bowls,
"Wasted my life with women of dark souls,
"Died brothel-fighting - drunk on muscatel."
Said he, "My friend, you've been directed wrong:
"You've naught to recommend you for our feasts -
"Like factory owners, brokers, elders, priests;
"The air for you! This place is for the strong!
"Then as I pondered, minded to rebel,
He laughed and forthwith kicked me out of Hell.
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