Thursday, August 5, 2010

Picking Your Truth

Her evil grace:
I am feeling extremely 'needy' today

His Lordship:
Hmmmmm devil horns smiley
i live for these days you know

Her evil grace:
thank god

His Lordship:
your wish is my command

Her evil grace:
they told me when i woke up
"the truth will set you free"
have any idea what they meant? i am blinded, im sure

His Lordship:
Realizing the reality of what does matter will tear you away from the many prisons of focusing your energy on that which does NOT matter
Falsehooods=Useless garbage that clouds a person's mind

But knowing truth can be a tricky thing
sometimes living with the truth can be more work than living a lie

Someone may embrace the "Truth" of giving themselves to their god and focusing only on that.
And that may make their minds less cluttered, give them focus, and take away all those decisions which dont factor in to the chosen "Truth"
And this may make their lives far easier.

Being a Slave to an ideal takes away all the complex choices.
Being a sheep saves you from truly independent thought

Living your life is a selective process in which YOU choose which ideals you enslave yourself to.

Truth is ALWAYS far more chaotic than Fake, than lies, than self-deception.

You decide which "truth" is YOUR truth. If you can't, then you are enslaved to your inability to pick a path.

So, pretty much, you're fooked.
either way

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Conversations: Love in your head

i'm getting too carried away
i over analyze way too much
not that its a bad thing, at times, its not

i think that its a good thing 90% of the time
for anyone, not just you

for me, it brings doubt
doubt builds walls

Sometimes Doubt is the best thing you can have

it does make for a lonely world though

well doubt, not complete negativity.
trust is a concept most easily held by those who have never been hurt

oh for sure

Doubt is a lesson learned

but getting past doubt...

can be a hard thing...

brick wall

i throw up my brick walls and tear them down just as quickly, then before i know they are back again. My inner mind looks like a bombed out city

pure chaos

rooted in ever-rolling lava

my brick wall is a dead end - dead
i am unfamiliar with looking past things

i dont try to look to far ahead
i pretend that I will surely die before the future ever arrives
so i do the wrong things over and over again, because they feel so right in the moment

story of my life

some would ask- what is more important 1 lasting love or 100 fleeting ones...
and since deep inside i doubt the existence of a love that lasts, I absorb every bit of passion, joy and life from the ones i know that are doomed from the start...
but that simplifies it. Because I never know they are doomed. My Doubt tells me they are
but that one spark of hope that lights up my heart tells me this love IS Real. And this could be that "one magical forever" that all women tell me exists. Oddly enough no men talk of this.

Imagine that

I believe in Fantasies, that I do. Most men dont
Most women do.
Men in most cases need a woman to inspire them to a greater sense of love
they need someone to make them Believe- where a woman wants a man she can believe IN.
Thats my take on it. The right moment, the right touch, the right words, the right look - all of these can make me BELIEVE> and when i believe, damn, but i'm a believer.
The more you believe, though, the harder the crash
the further the fall
and I never learn, because when I lose myself in that belief, that is the ONLY time I am alive.

i hope you're saving this...?

um,.. (embarrassed)
i was just opening my blog...