Time has come

Time has come

I.

So many loves lost

And still just one life to lose

Shadows reverberate in my memories of this lost moment-

(or that one… I forget)

While the present stands still as a corpse

As still as I try to hold this life

not-quite-lost

Yet never, apparently, to be … found.

II.

I try each day to give up on this addiction to – life

Attempting to block out meanings so endlessly futile

And reasons that just bring deeper guilt

III.

I hold my heart, I smother it, one beat at a time

I whisper to it softly, “Hush.. close your eyes. It will all be over soon”

Forgive, Forswear, but above all- Forget.

These open eyes have done nothing but curse me, all these years

“There will come a time, you’ll see, when no more tears- and love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears. Get over your hill- and see- what you find there, with grace in your heart and fly- was in your head..” Mumford and sons, After the storm

IV.

There will come a time, you’ll see-

When the only thing you fear- is keeping on.

V.

Endlessly twisting, this fate of mine

Always held it in my hands- Am I lucky that way?

or is that me taking destiny by a strong hand and shaking my own fears into submission?

I have always known that I own this life

Double edged sword, that.

Believing it, makes me understand that THIS is the future I bequeathed myself.

No one to blame but me

Own the Hell that you have given yourself.

If you can.                         

VI.

Myself? I’m working on it.

Fade, 7/1/2014 .. fuck, did I make it this long? Still don’t know if that’s a shame or a blessing...